An Emotional Poet
I write poems sometimes, when the feelings I carry are bigger than the space it needs inside me.
DISINTEGRATED
I have no poetry in me
My eyes are dry
My face is stone
Stretched by a tick I can’t control
No glitter in my stare
But I am only 35
This fucker and that
Panic attacks is all I got
And on the scale of emotion
It’s all below 30% alive
Why do we humans lie?
My chest is burning
And I wonder what’s inside
That heart escaped the scene
The last time I was wiped
Each little fibre in me is tired
I wish I could explode
Disintegrated
Into atoms
United with magical stardust
TIME
Open your eyes
Dark changes into light
The day goes by
It fades into another day
There goes a week
More weeks flip
Here goes a month
Another month jumps
It's gone, you didn't even notice
And it's been a year now
Autumn, winter, spring, now it's hot again
Time!
It flows at the speed of life
Life comes and goes
Don't you forget to blink
It's 3am and you are 83
What have you done?
How many times did you fall in love?
And did you smile often enough?
Done what you wanted?
Please do not miss out
Seize every moment
Live a little
Look around
Your life is here and it's gone
Pause, breathe
Take what your heart desires
The time is slipping
The light turns into dark
That is one day
Today is almost done
WHAT, WHERE, WHO
What is driving people?
Money.
What is important?
Time.
Where is beauty?
Nature.
What is precious?
Health.
What do people fear?
Death.
What is everywhere?
Love.
What do we have?
Body.
What can't you keep?
Age.
What makes you happy?
You.
What makes you cry?
Feelings.
What is the meaning of life?
Nothing.
What can you hear?
Music.
Where the home is?
Heart.
What's in your brain?
World.
What is pain?
Loss.
Who are you?
Decide...
TRICKED
I'm agonising.
My body lost control.
The chest is bursting.
I feel the pain in my soul.
My heart is aching.
It has exploded into millions of bits.
I feel the fire in my throat.
I cannot breathe.
My mind is frantic.
I want the thoughts of him to disappear.
A calming voice says, "Give it time"
Another screams "how could I be so blind?!"
It seems a boulder weighs me down.
I grasp for breath, but I am drowned.
Give me knives, cut those ropes!
Let the fucking drumming stop!
My temples pulse.
Those veins burn with lies.
He got under my skin,
I did not want to let him in,
But he is toxic,
I've been tricked.
He lured, he fooled, he disappeared.
He poisoned me again.
Where did I go wrong?
Why didn't I prevent it...
That fucking pain!
It burns, it suffocates, it kills.
Wait, here comes the wind.
Do blow at me and through,
And make me new.
Pick up the bits and pieces,
And carry it away from me.
I beg, let me be free.
THE GHOST OF THE PAST
Now suddenly my past is back,
I am haunted.
No wait, I am not.
It's not a demon, nor an angel,
Just a friendly ghost
Of what it was.
Yes, there was love,
Nothing ever starts without that.
Then the routine took its turn,
There was resentment too,
We fought and lost,
That game never works.
But why say when it ends,
It ends in hate and ruins?
The end is always bitter,
It is cruel.
But time heals,
The hurt and pain fades,
The soul gets carved,
And everything that was
Turns into diamonds.
Years go by,
You never know what is ahead,
And suddenly that ghost
Is here to stay.
No, there are no regrets.
You trim and shed the hurts,
Just love gets through,
That's how it works.
The meaning of life,
It's aim and purpose,
Is happiness in you,
There is no other way.
My friendly ghost,
I welcome you into my life.
Cheer up, don't be afraid,
Forget the bad,
Let us embrace.
We are today
Made of all that was.
Hence only words left
I thank you, it was worth it.